This was without a doubt the scariest moment in our lives. As we stepped into the forest, all I could think of was all of those horror movies I had seen of people disappearing in a forest. I could tell by Marie’s unsteady breathing that she was as terrified as myself. We heard a crunch of a pile of leaves behind us and we turned around and our deafening screams echoed through the cold night… We reassured each other that it was just a squirrel or something. Just as we thought everything was ok, we turned around and saw my infuriating brother!
3 Comments
Wow Eimear! This story is packed with superb phrases and vocabulary! I loved 'unsteady breathing' as it showed the reader how the character was feeling. It also brings the reader right into the scene, I felt I was an eyewitness! Again, your use of onomatopoeia 'a crunch' again engaged my senses and your use of the prompt 'deafening screams' at that point, kept me on alert!
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Team Gaelscoil Chilldara
17/5/2020 10:02:45 am
A brilliant descriptive piece Eimear, the reader was there beside your characters all the way through your 100 WC. Great use of adjectives, adverbs, using our senses,and a twist at the end, I could finally breathe again when the bother appeared, phew.
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James Kelsey
17/5/2020 02:06:28 pm
Got me going their really intriguing
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